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I have heard the Groove Armada played at two different places in Prague: the first was discothèque, and the second was a little Zizkov hole in the wall by the name of Chocobamba.

Go figure.

Music wise, a Prague discothèque is a Prague discothèque is a Prague discothèque, but as for Choco, well that’s just a whole ‘nother kettle of fish, my friend. The tunes there usually consist of a discordant blend of alt. hip-hop ala Dr. Octagon mixed with a little bit of Scandinavian dragon slayer metal, but whatever, I dig the place, if not for the music than for the attentive bar service. There are two bartenders that rotate throughout the week, so any given night you either get:

1) the short mean-looking one with a shaved head (def an AC Sparta fan if you catch my drift) who constantly scowls while alternating between beer pours and Tiger Woods Xbox 360, which he plays on their one and only TV screen, or

2) the big soft-spoken friendly one who skates around a little fingerboard while hunched over on a barstool bustin’ ollies in his portable mini skate park, which, from my perspective, kinda resembles an old Micromachines set-up.

On the night of this particular Choco occasion, I was accompanied, as usual, by my French roommate Tomas – the two of us in search of a little underthetabledeal to polish off our daily grind. For me, it had been a day of teaching Talking Heads music to my Wednesday beginner English class, and for him, it was servin’ up Royals w/ cheese on Wenceslas while trying not to brawl with a**hole customers. Anyways, I digress, but needless to say, it had been a rough day.

Luckily for us, we got bartender #2, and even better, he was spinning some really chill electro-funk tunes that made our first brew of the night go down extra smooth. Neither of us recognized the band, so when Tomas went up to the bar to inquire as to the name, the big ‘ol bear flashed a sheepish smile, reached behind the counter for a piece of paper from among the “other kinds of papers,” scribbled something down, folded it, and slid it across the bar top – Groove Armada.

Now a year later, I see rows of their purple posters slapped around town for their concert tonight, so I figure I might as well share what I’ve learned about this band since then:

Figuratively speaking, Groove Armada is a duo of London hipsters (Andy Cato, Tom Findlay) who are the street corner sluts loitering around the electro-rock-pop neighborhood of the Chemical Brothers, Fat Boy Slim, Justice, Basement Jaxx, and the Crystal Method. Ok, maybe that came out a little harsh; I should choose my words more carefully - they love to “collaborate,” starting with Patti Page, who’s vocals from “Old Cape Cod” circa 1957 were sampled to give that lazy summer sway to their first hit song “At the River,” catapulting them into notoriety as the ultimate Ibiza sunset groovemeisters. If you happen to go to this show, expect to hear this track at SaSaZu in some form or another and be sure to watch for Cato workin’ his trombone to soften up the crowd with a little bluesy brass melody. **extra points to Andy for having some authentic musicianship here**

Subsequent collaborations reflect the evolution of their style from beachfront “chill out” vibes to pop-dancefloor “tits and acid” tracks like their bouncy single “Get Down” with grime-reggaeton MC Lady Stush, “I See You Baby” with Gram’ma Funk, and “Love Sweet Sound” with 70s funk-soul-sister Candi Staton. Their tunes are danceable and will fit the ‘SAZU scene with plenty of hypnotic loops, yet for the most part, they retain a more defined chorus-driven structure colored with soulful vocal samples, heavy basslines, reggae style rhythms, a little bit of rock, a little bit of downtempo trip-hop, and (my personal favorite) plenty of spacey futuristic blips and beeps throughout, so you can still listen to them on an iPod without feeling like too much of a dance beat-fueled robot. In fact, most of their tracks would probably fit right at home on some sassy Afro-silhouette Ipod commercial if they hadn’t already been featured in Nike, Marks and Spencer, and Renault TV campaigns.

Anyways, here’s the bottom line: the concert is 990 czk, which to me is absurd. I give props to SaSaZu for trying to unite rock concert goers with danceclubcenesters by calling in the Armada (who, don’t get me wrong, do have some great tracks and are worth seein), but the fact is, when you’re charging a Czech grand plus 55 crowns for .3L malé Pilsners, I’ll take my Chocobamba with some bizarro beats, 30 czk .5L pivo, and a little bit of green any day of the week and twice on Sunday.

Shout out to my Choco crews – including Dutchmaster Natan who introduced me to the spot, even though you still owe me that photo of Tomas and I with Jeru the Damaja, son! Lemme get that!

Concert starts 9pm
SaSaZu = Holešovická tržnice 
Bubenské nábřeží 306 
Prague 7
Chocobamba = Praha 3 - Žižkov. Krásova 6